"In the clamor one is irresistibly drawn to the woman who sits gracefully relaxed, keeps her hands still, talks in a low voice and listens with responsive eyes and smile. She creates a spell around her, charming to the ear, the eye, and the mind." Good Housekeeping 1947
This is not a quality that I readily posses!
"Sits gracefully relaxed" - I have never been very graceful. I find it boring to just sit. Relaxing is not something that comes easily to me. I like to stay busy. Doing. Creating. Learning. Reading. Teaching.
"Keeps her hands still" - Again, not something that is easy for me. I find my mind wondering. Wondering what I could be doing, cleaning, making.
"Talks in a low voice" - We're still not hitting any winners.
"Listens with responsive eyes and smile" - Other mothers perhaps. Well, laying in bed is my favorite time with the kids because that's when I can just sink into the moment and listen. But what about during the day?
"She creates a spell around her" - Do my children always want to be around me? What about my husband? Others? I am not blind or dumb enough to believe they do. I want to think that the majority of the time I behave in a way that draws people to me instead of away from me. However, it's only by the power of the Holy Spirit that I can accomplish this. Not me.
In times past, when a quality or character trait was brought to my attention that I did not feel fit well into my personality I would brush it off, believe God only meant that for the more introvert type. "That's not how He made me. I'm an extrovert. I'm a doer. I'm loud. I'm outgoing." Yet, through the years I have learned that although God made us each with specific traits and personalities, with each of those comes good and bad characteristics. Things that we naturally posses and others that we need to grow into. Hopefully a bit of wisdom has opened me to the fact that perhaps.....I need more repose.
Repose (noun)
1. the state of being @ rest; sleep
Psalm 91:1 Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
2. peaceful; tranquility; calm
Psalm 107:30 They were glad when it grew calm, and he guided them to their desired haven.
3. Dignified calmness, composure
Proverbs 31:25 She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
Sure, I could use some more of those in my life this year!
I don't believe that I will write down the same ol' resolutions that seem to be a revolving door on my January 1st calendar....pay off this bill, eat healthier, exercise more, do this, do that.
I believe this year is a year of focusing on the "big" stuff. Well, actually the "little" things that no one else sees but I know need fixed. Things God desires to see brought into alignment with His will. Those are the items that need priority. As for the others, I will always have another bill to pay. Eating healthy and exercising will be a habit that I must keep returning to my entire life. There will always be another drawer to clean, wall to paint, floor to scrub. But those don't matter for eternity or even make me feel better here on earth if I'm not doing them with an attitude of peace and calm. Sure, they help me feel more organized and clean and healthy, which in turns brings a freedom to do other things, but today....January 1st, 2013, I'm going to start with a prayer to have more repose.
Full of things that have never been."
~Rainier Maria Rilke
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